GODSTOMP

That's what I call it when I try to do something that is not what You-Know-Who wants for me. This does not happen if you haven't elected to give up and hand yourself over like FBI's Most Wanted. But if you have, then certain things are going to be stomped.

You can persist beyond the stomping but you generally find that the results are screwed up from start to finish and eventually you stop fighting. Death of the little "i" (see Chihuahua post). Ultimate antithesis to how we are brought up to believe that our lives and our destinies are in our hands. In a way they are; you can choose to live under the Will or outside of it. But under it, you have to become a soldier to the King to whom you've sworn allegiance.

The Stomp has happened several times in my life, most recent being with some extracurricular activities I joined. They weren't "bad;" I wasn't running off to shoot heroin or rob widows & orphans.

But they were stomped through Forces of Nature, Technology and Employment. A trifecta of WARNING! WARNING! DANGER! DO NOT GO THERE! So in spite of my desire to go there I am letting it rest for now. Don't know why but I trust that I have to let this go. It sucks for so many reasons I can't talk about on the Net.

That's one of the hardest things, that trust. You think you're doing the right things sometimes and you're suprised and dismayed when it's not your path.

Still learning on this one. Watching to see why it was stomped.